How does perception and bipolar work together?
Sadly they don’t work well what so ever.
I know I’m not fat. My clothes prove that fact. I exercise 3-5 times a week depending on time availability.
But when I look in the mirror, I still see the chubby short kid who used to get picked on when he was a kid.
I took a picture of myself and immediately deleted it. I looked like I was in a carnival mirror. I was horrified. I believe I’m doing better, but I can’t see it.
Living with bipolar for so many years, I realize how my perceptions have been skewed. I know reality from fiction. I know to discern whether I’m doing well or not.
The perception of someone who is bipolar goes against every intelligent thought.
On the depressed side, it’s all worse. It’s all harder.
On the manic side, your invincible. It’s perfect madness.
It’s all madness to a point.
The picture of me I took proved one thing to me. That I’m still not ok with me. I’m still scared. That may never change.
But I keep fighting.